Back on October 13th, I was contacted by a scammer with this format:
DELIVERY AGENT OF SUN TRUST BANK OF AMERICA USA
IM JENNIFER SANDRA AND I’M HERE AS THE DELIVERY AGENT OF SUN TRUST BANK OF AMERICA USA SO ALL YOU NEED TO DO NOW IS TO GET ME YOUR FULL INFORMATION AND A PICTURE OF YOU SO THAT I WILL PROCEED IMMEDIATELY WITH THE DELIVERY SO GET BACK TO ME ASAP
PLS BE SINCERE WITH ME.
WE ARE VERY VERY READY TO DELIVER YOUR FUNDS SMOOTH AND SUCCESSFUL ONE
I responded as a senile old man who hadn’t got a clue about…well, pretty much anything. After days of leading Jennifer in circles, my elderly gentleman wound up sending gift cards off to another scammer (me again). The original scammer begged my fake scammer character to have mercy and send him the card codes. Upon being asked what he wanted the money for he replied:
Video games and a night at the clubs.
I decided I must bait this twerp to hell and back. So here’s what happened:
My fake scammer asked forgiveness for the gift card theft, and then decided to make it up to Jennifer, who admitted “her” real name was Emmanuel, by letting him help with co-scamming a client. The client was a megachurch, and they were looking to donate to Nigerian orphanages. All Emmanuel had to do was pretend to own an orphanage.
Only problem is - I am also the pastor of the megachurch.
Emmanuel sent in his “Help our orphans” scam letter to my pastor character. The pastor demanded proof of faith prior to donating. Emmanuel was to hold a sign reading “GLORY TO THE HOLY LAMB - MATTHEW 4:19” complete with a hand-drawn lamb symbol. He complied:
Not acceptable! I wrote back asking if he had a bad case of facial leprosy. This embarrassed him into sending a good photo:
So now he thought he would get his money. But he went further. Emmanuel asked the pastor for PCs and video games, for the children of course
This stuff was all mailed to Emmanuel. But we needed to make sure our post office worker in Nigeria did not deliver such an expensive box to a thief, so Emmanuel had to send in his full body photo:
Emmanuel would’ve gotten the box today - but the Nigerian mailman ran over a goat in the road and crashed. Too bad. The only way Emmanuel can get his box now is by hiking 100+ miles to Benin City and picking it up there. Otherwise, that mailman might get greedy and run off with his loot…stay tuned for updates!