202-677-8166 – I made poor Officer Eric Brown, IRC013561 CRAZY! I called and said that my daughter answered the phone because they are on half day today poor me and she said it was important I call back but it took me awhile because Alden had stuck his head in the toilet and tried to flush himself. Can you tell me what this is about? We went thru the usual name and address and phone number and bust size (no, silly I just added that) and he asked me if I knew what this was about. I said, Hold on a minute. CORNELIA, don’t tease your brother with that snake you found in the yard. Yes, sir, you were saying? He got off his script. Oops. He started again with the Crime and Inwestigation Unit thing and I said Hold on, ALDEN stop putting peanut butter in your sister’s hair and on the cat! Oh my gawd, I hate half days kids should be in school so I can get a break. You were saying? He said when did you last file your taxes? I said Two days ago. Um, vat? Yeah, my husband mailed them two days ago. He said for this year or last year? I said Do you mean this year as in 2018 or 2017 or do you mean last year as in 2017 or 2016 cause we filed for 2017 cause 2018 ain’t over yet. Did we do it wrong? He started his script about the arrest warrant. I said, Hold on, Cornelia! do not put your brother in the dryer again. Lord help me! You were saying? He started with the arrest warrant. I said What arrest warrant? He said the one under my name. I said Under MY name? My husband files joint taxes. Hold on, ALDEN, do not put the cat down the garbage disposal. You were sayin? He said Um, vell, I will talk to my supervisor and call you back. I said WHEN cause I got two brats here. BY the way, your office is very loud. Do you have the TV playing or something? He said no it just was loud. I said Are you all in little cubicles? He said no. I said so you are at desks next to each other so you can hear each and everything the next person says? You need little cubicles. He said, They were under construction. I said, Good to know where my tax dollars are going. CORNELIA, do not put your brother in the bathtub full of water and bleach! OH MY GAWD! You know what I mean? Kids!!! He could not wait to get off the phone. I said Well what time are you callin? He said 6. I said Good cause my husband will be home and you can talk to him. Hold on, ALDEN, stop hitting your sister with your skateboard. He said have a nice day. I said ARE YOU JOKIN WITH ME? I will send you these kids in a box and you can see if you have a NICE DAY! Oh, I am so sorry. I am just a wee bit AGGRAVATED and having a bad day, can you tell? He sighed and hung up. That was fun!
@JusticeinTexas#27948 I read this to my husband when he called for lunch and he said it was the funniest yet. I said But you always say that!!!
@JusticeinTexas#27948 The end of a call being a sigh and a hang up is the sign of a job well done!
P.S. - ALL of your stories are hilarious! :)
@6flagsray#27971 Don’t ask me where they come from. Well, I do have 3600 books in the house and have read most of them so I have a lot of ideas rattling around in my head but actually, I don’t know what I am going to say until I actually hear the scammers voice and that kind of helps me decide.
@6flagsray#27971 Yes, I think getting them to groan or sigh is better than making them swear.
@JusticeinTexas#27975 ^ Double thumbs-up to that! They have to feel so defeated when they get to that point and that is exactly what they deserve.
@6flagsray#27976 And they STILL think they were talking to a real person. That is the funniest part! I would love to be a fly on the wall when they tell their fellow scammers about the crazy woman they just talked to.
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NAME: BRUCE VICTOR RAE
ADDRESS: 122 GUILDWOOD PARKWAY, TORONTO, ON, M1E 1P3
BIRTH DATE: MARCH 19, 1957
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